A letter from April 8th, 2021

Dear FutureMe, hi genie <3 how are you ? i’m 17 this year. time flies so quickly, i’ll be doing my igcse in a month. 2020 was ****. 2021, so far is ********. i met this boy, his name was kim jeeheon. he’s 18, korean, and i met him online. we started to talk on and off from may 2020, and got together october 2020. i called him everyday for hours, gave him my time. when we met i was happy, he seemed genuine and i thought i was finally ready to love again after patrick. i was the happiest i’ve ever been. but on january 13, i found out that he had been cheating. it turns out he had a girlfriend all this while he was with me. the guy that made me the happiest i’ve been, the guy that i thought i could trust, the guy that made me learn how to love again, ended up being the guy that hurt me the worst. i was and still am in the worst state i’ve ever been. breaking down during my classes, infront of my family, and so on. i’ve never went a day not breaking down. i hate feeling this way. not to mention it happened during my mocks ( but i managed to not fail ) i hate him for real he is so ugly pencil looking ******* i hope he dies. he is still w the girl ( which is 14 btw ). but her choice idc about her life. anyways, i hope you are well. i hope you have someone that you love. i hope you don’t simply trust anyone anymore. i’m studying hard everyday for igcse so i’m hoping i get good results ! your friends love you, although sometimes i don’t believe that i have anyone. but you do. u really do. i wonder where you are at life. are you still best friends with kimie? rachel? heeba? jiet yee? sandy? i hope you are. i want a boyfriend but i’m scared to love again. it’s hard to trust anyone. i felt so worthless and i’m scared that i have to go through that again. it was hell. you’re starting to like makeup now. you’re awesome at eyeliner especially! but gotta work on those brows girl they are hideous. orange blossom is your fav scent and it’s from jo malone! it’s expensive but teeheeeeeeeee i hope you lose some weight hopefully you’re at 46 or 47.. also are you still short??? ( 155 ) i hope you start to love yourself. rn i’m js chilling and watching demon slayer w mocha hehe stay healthy! be happy :) - r