A letter from February 22nd, 2021

Dear FutureMe, I’ve been feeling so sad lately and I don’t know why or the reason behind why I feel this. What I know, is that I am hurting. Hurting from things I can’t discuss. And, I am writing this letter in the middle of my rushed activities for my online class. Well, I do hope that my future won’t procrastinate anymore. I’ve fought battles that no one knows. No one really wants to listen. I tried, but it didn’t work out. Lol. I did try. But, everytime na makakakuha ako ng lakas ng loob para magkwento, people will make a joke about it or they will enter another topic which shows that they are not actually interested with what I am about to say or sometimes, they won’t really listen. It’s hard, having no one to listen to your thoughts or your problems. I have friends, but no one is really willing to listen. I hope that by the time you read this, you’ll have someone to share your thought or someone who is actually willing to listen. Well, the last time you thought you have it broke your heart. I’ve been thinking, am I really worthy of being loved? Or being heard? Am I? ‘Cause I don’t feel like it. I don’t know, pero I hope hindi ka na malungkot. I do hope that your laugh will be genuine and your smile will be pure happiness, without sorrows. I hope you won’t expect too much from someone. AND I DO HOPE YOU’LL STOP WRITING POEMS FOR THEM. Isn’t that our agreement before? To never write a poem or any letter for a guy. Well, I guess we all broke the rules we set for ourself. What I want to tell you is that, I want you to be happy and successful. Lovingly yours, Jason 2021