A letter from February 2nd, 2021

Dear FutureMe, hey friend. it’s 2021 and i’ve been going through it. i’m trying to lose weight since i’ve gained a lot from quarantine. i’m reaching for any moments of peace and that feeling of being ALIVE. it’s what keeps me going. today mom and i got lots of coffee and drove around. i even put my head outside the window for a moment. it was amazing. i felt like i was free. i’m going to do it again soon hopefully. there’s beautiful moments to catch here while we are alive. and even though i’ve lost almost everything that feels like me, i’ve realized that none of these things make me, me. not dance, not shows that i watch, not makeup or music or anything. i am eternal and just literally energy inside a body. view things as if your higher self was watching them after your body has passed. feel the breeze on your face. touch something around you. take a deep breath. because in this moment you can feel, and you’re alive, and you’re experiencing. you’re living. that is you. okay i love you and i swear on everything if you think this is sappy i’ll be mad. lol jk. but actually though i hope you’re doing okay and i’m rooting for you. seriously i totally am. also you better have your braces off and you better be smiling. i literally have no clue what your life will look like in 5 years. but ****, i hope you find joy and love in anything. i mean you will because you are me. things will be different, maybe even extremely difficult, but either way i love you and nothings changing that. that love isn’t going anywhere. you’ll be off the train ;)