A letter from January 28th, 2021

Dear FutureMe, what the hell. You're going to be so old when you receive this. Right now, I'm 16. You're 21! You can drink! But please don't drink.. You're in University. I'm literally a high school sophomore. I just applied for an IB Diploma. I have faith that I will get it. Last night I cried about being mestiza. I hope you aren't as conflicted about this as I am. I feel like I don't belong anywhere. I'm not white. I'm not Latina. I'm both, but also neither. I'm an enigma. A crazy smart queer mestiza enigma. Jobs will love you for that diversity. Do you remember the words Dad used to describe you in your IB application? I'll write them here, cause you've probably forgotten. "Thoughtful, Responsible, Funny, Intelligent, Independent, Compassionate, Analytical, Logical, Adventurous, Creative" Isn't that wonderful. I'm about to start crying again while writing this, my god. Everyone loves you, and I know you love to forget that. You forget a lot of things. But I still love you. I think back to five years ago from now. I was in 5th grade. I had just moved from Seattle. I miss Seattle. It was our home. This time 5 years ago (for me, 10 years for you), I just went to Polly's birthday party. I got her a card, I think. And later, I gave her a little penguin from adventure time funko pop (it had to arrive from amazon). Do you remember Mr. Lehman? He was chill, I guess. Remember the nicknames he gave you? Fiz, Fig, Squirrel. He was weird. Do you remember Quotev? You were really into that, huh. Weirdo.... Still on the topic of teachers. I hope all the good ones went to your graduation. Mrs. Richards, I hope she cheered so loud for you, and I hope you thanked her for forcing you to see your natural strengths. Mr. Hammonds, I hope he wasn't dead by the time you graduated, and I hope you talked to him about anarchy and 1984. Mr. Coleman, I hope you thanked him for making you become more confident in your writing. Speaking of, do you remember that monologue you wrote for Being Alive? About being *** and having religious trauma? It was very poetic. Remember everyone saying they thought a teacher wrote it? Remember Coleman basically saying 'holy crap, you wrote that?!?'? I'm literally putting off my government assignment to write this letter. I have Spanish class in 15 minutes. COVID!!! AAAGHHH!!! THAT'S HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!! It's crazy. I can't wait to get a vaccine, I can't wait to go back to school, I can't wait to be able to go out with my friends again. Joe Biden is the president. I wonder who is the president when this arrives? The executive orders he signed on day 1 were pretty poggers. Is Harriet Tubman on the $20 bill now? I hope you're in love. And I hope she's in love with you, too. I hope you have a cat. DON'T HAVE KIDS UNTIL YOU'RE, LIKE, 29!!!! Make sure your life is over before you start a new one. Are you still in the country or have you fled. I hope you've fled. I hope you've visited many, many places, and seen so many natural wonders. This earth is beautiful. You are too. Even when you don't recognize the face in the mirror, or when pants don't fit. You're one of a kind, Sofia. And of the best kind. You're basically royalty. The other day, Leia sent a form to the groupchat (previously named MYSTERY GRANOLA, currently named Savannah is god). In it, EVERYONE said they would date YOU out of the friend group. I hope you still talk to them. And I hope you've made new friends too. Every time I write one of these letters, I am just filled with love and awe for whoever will be receiving it. I don't know you yet, but I will. And I have faith that you're everything I wanted to be. We have been through so much. And as Kelly Clarkson said, "What doesn't **** you makes you stronger". Current favorites: TV/Movies: Star Wars (i'm trapped here.. help...), NBC Hannibal, Maurice (still), Pirates of the Carribean Books: The Great Gatsby .... (i'm reading the da vinci code right now. so far very good. i also have faith that the song of achilles will be very good) Songs: Alrighty Aphrodite by Peach Pit, Lovefool by The Cardigans (favorite song to play on the bass, too), Ya No Hay Verano by Depresión Sonora, Out Like a Light 2 by The Honeysticks, no, the moon by Teen Suicide, FNAF SONG X MONEY MACHINE, Clone High Theme, Take Me to Church by Hozier, Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths, For a Chance to Live by Orange Joe I don't know what else to say. I'm tired. Nicki Minaj is the queen of rap. I hope everyone who reads this on the FutureMe site gets an insight into the past. And into you, I guess. This is personal or whatever. To everyone reading: hello! If you ever wanna get a 10 year letter, the best time to write it is now! Anyway. Sofia, you're awesome. It's a lot better to love myself when I am not yet the person I am loving. Like you're some other entity, almost. It almost feels like I'm writing to an older sister. But I'm not. I love you... I love you. I love you so, so much. I know you're doing great things. Keep going. I love you as much as you love the moon. Sofia from 2021 <3