A letter from January 7th, 2021

today i am feeling angry. i am feeling disappointed. i am feeling scared. i am feeling frustrated. but im also not surprised. the outcome of the 2020 election was something that had been predicted from many acts before yesterday. from innocent ******** of POC throughout the country from the beginning and creation of this country to the separations of families at the border to the election of Trump. this hatred towards people of color has been here since the beginning. these inequalities and fear started since Europeans stepped foot into the Americas. what happened yesterday was no surprise. it was a result of the pushed aside issues that linger in this country. my family came to this country with the hopes of better living conditions. and I deeply wish we hadn't. here I learned a different type of fear a different type of hate. not for my skin because I look very pale myself, but for my name, for my accent, for my friends, for my community. i learned of true hate and evil. i learned of the feeling of being frustrated and angry but not being able to do anything because at the end of the day they are still more powerful and privileged. what happened yesterday was terrorism and the fact that many people dare to compare the BLM movement doesn't sit right with me. i don't understand. i don't understand why how. i am hoping that in five years children and families that come into this country don't experience this fear and anger. i am hoping in five years from now there's change and equality. i know its going to take a long time but I'm tired of seeing over and over on the news and social media losses for POC. i hope that in five years I can say that I am contributing towards change in this awful country.