A letter from December 14th, 2020

Dear FutureMe, Hey future me. How is life? 2020 is in the final weeks and its been a crazy year. What started off as a gut wrenching year of heartache and pain is somewhat good now. At the start of the year I was fighting trying to keep my dead end, going nowhere relationship with Michael. Back in May I had my tubes tied for him in hopes it would make things better... What was I thinking?! I knew I wanted more kids... at least one more. 3 weeks after that surgery I left Michael. I went to be with Nathan. Yes, yes silly to think back on how if I would have never went back to Michael that first time and listened to Nathan then maybe my tubes never would have gotten tied. 3 weeks after leaving Michael for good I moved in with Nathan. Something I begged and fought Michael on for almost a year and never got. Crazy move. weeks after dating someone I move in with them. Even more crazy 4 months later we get married! Things haven't ben perfect. We irritate each other sometimes, but God do I love this man. He tries so had and does so well at making me happy. So how is the first 5 years of marriage? Our wedding in 2021, how did it go? Did I find my dream dress? Did we get to go to Disney world for our honeymoon? Did we have to wear those dang mask the whole time? What about our daughter? Is she doing good in school? Did her biological dad get his life together or is it still a struggle to co-parent with him? Does she still cry about not wanting to go over there or does she stay with us full time now? Did I ever get my tubes untied like Nathan and I talked about? Did we try for another baby? Hey, What about that puppy you've been wanting? The cocker spaniel. Has Nathan gave in yet? Have we made plans to go to universal studios and see Hogwarts? I've been dying to go. There is so many adventures with Nathan I hope to take. How is our anxiety and depression now? Do I still have to take medication daily for it? Did I quit or get fired from my super stressful job yet? Am I a stay at home mom with an etsy store like I've dreamed about, or am I working somewhere else? What about the trailer and land? Please tell me I sold it and I'm not having to worry about that bill anymore. What about mom and dad? Have they finally moved on from one another or do they still live together and fight daily? Austin? How is he? He should be graduation High School by now. Did he? Did he straighten up any? He's a good kid, just caught in a toxic home life. I wish I could help him more.... I hope these 5 years will/have become all of the things we have dreamed about. Try to remember to take things one day at a time.