A letter from November 15th, 2020

Dear self in 5 years, It's hard and that's okay, you're tired and that's okay to learn to forgive yourself. Learn to let go of your pride. Yes, it's hard but you can try to make it easier. The next five years are going to be rough right now your a grade 11 student sitting at home writing a letter to herself because you've had enough. It's so tiring to not be understood to be painted as the bad guy constantly without them asking how I am. Ikaw nalang palaging mali at oo may mail ka naman talaga doon pero di nila nakikita mga mali nila sayo. You'll probably have a hard time in the next five years. Might have a really hard time in school because you don't believe that you are capable but you're going to overcome that. Youll get where you going and you're going to leave. You just have to get through the next few years then you'll leave. Leave and finally get what you want to be alone. To be alone but not lonely. For them to stop thinking all my actions relate to them when it's not. It's so tiring. In 5 years you'd probably be a senior in college whether you take a med course or not I'm not sure myself. But if it's going to take a med course for me to leave then I'll take it. I need to leave I really do I don't want to stay here anymore. I love my family I do but I can't stay here anymore. In 5 years you'll be a better you. Strong, independent, capable woman. In 5 years you're going to at the top of your game. High grades, good friends, a relationship maybe? But all your hard work will pay off. You might go a little crazy in college but what's the fun in not doing stupid things. In 5 years you're going to be amazing.