A letter from November 1st, 2020

Dear FutureMe, The presence of arrogance that peeks through the door of my indecisiveness is extremely annoying. Not necessarily a thought but more of a thought process that happens every time I think of something. Thinking is a normal process for everybody and what you think does not need to be praised by this presence/alternate conscience. What fuels this conscience is something beyond my current knowledge. It has an ego of its own. Almost like a parasite that feeds on my vulnerabilities and takes advantage of my naivetes. I want this parasite to die. With time, I've come to realize how this parasite will die. I also know their name. This parasite is not something that can be ****** with false maturity. It is something that will die with time, just like every living thing. Their name is Petulant. Naivetes, indecisiveness, and cockiness all emit from childish mentality. Petulant will die as I grow older, but I feel as if I will miss them. Even after all the times they've made me feel false confidence, I will miss the parasite that once took advantage of me. Is it loneliness? Will I miss Petulant because there won't be another voice inside of my head except the echo of my own? I'll feel smaller without Petulant. Exposed. Should I miss my own faults? Should I be glad that I have acknowledged them? The parasite is still with me, right now. Should I cherish the time that I have with them? Or, should I wish for the days when they will die? So, to me in the future? Are you still a slave to the parasite named Petulant?