A letter from October 10th, 2020

Time Travelled — almost 5 years

Peaceful right?

Dear Ash, You probably don't remember writing this but its 3:15 in the morning. we're on the phone mila and miz (maana was here too but she went to sleep) do you remember emma? that was probably a lifetime ago to you now. anyway shes drunk tonight and i cant stop thinking about how much i admire her. shes a good person, i hope she find someone good for her IN Paris. i hope we're still friends. maybe text her sometime, see how she is!! i'm listening to moon by AKMU, i hope you still listen to them on nostalgic days. It's been a couple years since you finished your course right? wow, i've just started. It's kinda hard, I don't know if i'm happy yet but i hope i will be. Did you ever do that south asian focus piece you've always wanted to? did you become like Adena from the bold type ahhhh i have so many questions!! did you ever go to paris? did you ever fall in love. Have you met your person yet Do you still talk to our friends. if you haven't you should check up on them. they'll always love you. lmao do we still call sumaira, susan? i hope so right now I'm at home, but I live in Manchester. it's weird, but my flatmates lleyton, olly and amy are nice. I'm still hoping to live with Zahraa Nawaaz next year but i'm not so sure. I feel sort of content, I hope you do too (i'm listening to how can i love the heartbreak by AKMU now and i think you should too.) things are stressy, life feels unsure with covid and money. But i have a good support system. I hope your relationship with mum is still good. Amma really is a rock in my life, she grounds me sometimes and i don't appreciate how much she sacrifices for me everyday. Life may be different from what i expected 5 years from now. but i hope you know i'm really proud to be you. It's crazy. we've gone through ups and downs and rollercoasters but i'm still here. I hope you're still here too. are you financially independent? you better be oh my god PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME YOU HAVE A CAT omg is bella HUGE now? have you spoken to sana? our cousin? if not that's cool man i hope you made really good friends in manny, queer poc and generally just amazing people? yes. did zaynab get married btw? did u cry? lmfao bet u did what about the boys? do we have any sister in laws? god i hope theyre not awful omg mikail and sophia, theyre what? 14 and 12? i hope you still see them lmao. theyre probably so teen like. does mikail still wanna be a scientist? is sophie still sassy as hell? omg did your loona obsession fade? if it did you should listen to them. theyre discography is so so good, you know that.plus, they made u hella happy i hope you saw them live. did you ever go to south korea? i bet its beautiful there i hope you had a good day today. life might be tough but youve been through hell and back man, you can pull through pain, you always have. make sure youre hydrated, eat something too. I hope your sleeping pattern isn't as awful as mine is lmao. i could ask more but i feel like im probably crying or something knowing me u still look **** tho xx stay happy ash, you got this my guy.

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