A letter from August 23rd, 2020

Dear FutureMe, It's 25 year old you here. You're a bit scared, and a bit stressed about starting your PhD. You are about to move cities, after having been in London for ~6 years and making all of your real friendships as an adult here. You don't know where you're going to live, have major imposter syndrome, and everything has happened within around a month which seems very fast. Paul seems lovely, and you're hopeful he'll be a good mentor. You're hoping you'll make friends, and that you won't lose the ones you have back in London. You're sad to leave MS and JB and the others, but you know they're friends for life and that you can always visit. I hope it has worked out for you, but that even if it hasn't, that you have learnt from it. Whether you're a Doctor right now, or whether you are not, you will find your way in life as you always have. You've defeated your biggest demon and changed your world view once already, so I'm confident that you can handle challenges face on. I hope that Mum, Dad, Callum and James are well. You're overjoyed to have come closer to Callum and James this year (especially James). I hope he's healed and that they're both doing well. You've survived 5 months of living alone during a pandemic. Not many people can claim that. You're fiercely independent, perhaps even to a fault – I hope that you remain that way. If you have a partner, I hope that they push you to be better and that you do the same. I hope that you're wise, and that you're caring. I hope you're the kind of person that sends unexpected gifts in the post. I hope you've been back to Brazil, and that you've started learning your third language. I hope you're the kind of person that 15, 20 and 25 year old you would respect and want to be friends with. But I hope that you're fun too, and that you really lived your 20s. Hopefully you have some fun stories. Hopefully you made some of the worst times into funny stories. Maybe you even understand politics a bit more now. Perhaps everyone looks back on the pandemic with aghast expressions. You're a strong woman and you have every right to be proud of yourself. Love, PastYou