A letter from August 22nd, 2020

Dear FutureMe, Hey there from 2020, future me. It's 4 in the morning and Simon just received a letter from 2012. This year has been pretty.... bad, I'll be honest. Covid-19 has caused quite the situation this year. Remember Oliver? It's coming up on his second anniversary here in February. Noelle is still around, but by the time this reaches you, she probably won't be. I'm so sorry, it's probably making you sad. Remember her cute little waddle? She puked on my floor yesterday but I find myself not minding too much. Not her fault. BTS's new single Dynamite dropped yesterday at midnight. The youtube video has already reached well over 100M views! I'm happy for them. Amanda left yesterday after staying with us for a matter of months. Her bus gained 3 flat tires hours into the drive and everyone had to be taken back to Indianapolis. Crystal shared some wise words with me the other day, too. She told me that we don't get to choose what traumatizes us. Maybe that seems random, but she's right. I have so many signs of going through trauma, even if what I remember wasn't that bad. To be honest, I'm really nervous about the future. I'm 28 now and I'm still scared of dying. I still haven't found anyone to share my life with, either. Maybe it just won't change. But I'm trying to stay optimistic. Will I still be alive when this is supposed to reach you? Anything can happen. I just hope you're no worse for wear than we are now. The lupus is really starting to set in and with the cerebral palsy, some days are pretty bad. But I won't complain. I just want to remind you that things aren't all bad. Mom and dad love you, even if dad has put you through a lot. Honestly can't say if he'll be around when you get this, either. His health looks like it's getting worse and worse. It worries me something awful. I hope that this email means something to you. Hopefully by the time you get this, you’ll have at least started on a new writing project. :)