A letter from August 13th, 2020

heyy :)) it’s me from 2020 , the year when you realized a lot of things. before i start i want you to know that i hope you live your life how YOU want to not how mommy wants to. i hope you finally had your first kiss (with a girl or a boy ). if you are still alive please tell yourself that you love your yourself more often, right now you don’t , you don’t love yourself at all and not only that but you are honestly on the verge of hating yourself not just because you know that no one will ever love you not even your own mother. please tell me that daddy is okay and you finally said i love you to him in his face because you know his not gonna be around much longer. are you still depressed? does your family know that you are so mentally and physically drained that yo cant even bother to do your school work or even just take a shower. did you finally tell them that you starved yourself for a whole month and cried yourself to sleep very night but forced yourself to eat and put a smile on your face everyday for them. did you fall in love yet ? is it how you imagined ? did you tell your friends that you are bisexual and did they accept you ? baby you are loved and although no one tells you it you are needed . did you get accepted into a university out of south africa ? are you traveling the world ? do you still want to be a travel nurse ? did you finally loose weight, like your mother said no one will love you if you look like that. are you still in love with isabellagome.z on insta ? how is she doing and is she in a relationship ? are you starting to realize your religion is important and you need to start doing your part . did you build your own pc ? and are playing minecraft like you dreamed of ? is it in your own room. you better have realized that taylor will always be there for you and so would faith and sameeha if you never kept things from them . i know you are scared that you are being annoying with your problems when they also have problems to deal with but you should trust them enough to tell them that . but there is one big question i need to ask you: are you happy ? are you content with the life you lived ? at anytime if you were to die would you have said that you lived life at its max and with no regrets ? no one has no regrets certainly not us . don’t let anyone break your heart certainly not a boy they are not worth your beautiful heart<3 i love you so much i hope your went to your first pride parade i love i love you i love you baby you better send another one >:(