A letter from July 30th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, How you doin!? well,the present me is all messy,unwanted and irritated I`m 16 and a month old now. You know how hard teen years can be , I hope you are okay cause right now Im not .Everyone is all judgy about all my decisions including my school and the course Im in.they made me doubt myself just cause i took commerce.ah!screw them. My friends too arent even trying to help me cope up with my lonliness.They are adding to the misery.My whole life is now a big WTF? Anyway if you are reading this STAY STRONG LOVE. Do not give up easily cause that is what I often do and I regret it a lot. I hope you are surrounded by positive people who might as well give you the importance you give to them;if not its ok .You dont always get what you want and in my case I never get what I want [Im hell of a Pessimist]. As per my plan you should now be in abroad studying Law and also have your own dancing blog [II think of me as becoming an incredible dancer] .I hope you are on the right path. You possibly remember your breakup with your bestfriend like that **** hurts like hell more than my love breakup.well I think about her every now and then.I know Im stupid.who`s your BFF now? lemme take a guess.A boy who wears glass and is the most handsome around.Hope Im right.[these are defo not my preferences ,its a wild guess I promise.] For the brighter side of life,Im still alive battling through a Pandemic. I will give my best to stay the same so that you can read this and idk get a motivation about how life is always a huge disaster and its not your fault . Let me give you some advice.Stay away from stupidity.Friends arent always there for you[sooner you realize the better ].Also not everyone you think is your friend.Dont let people take you for granted.LOVE YOURSELF.Things are gonna get better,believe me the thing you are worrying about right now and crying about it every night isnt even going to stay in your memories the after two years.You might even laugh about how silly you were.Time heals everything,EVERYTHING.Focus on your skin health ,Dont make me look older than I actually am.Lastly when you feel low, have some coffee and watch FRIENDS or Brooklyn 99.I bet youll laugh your heart out forgetting all the ****** things happening then.When nothing goes well in life,take a nap. CURRENTLY MY FAVORITE SONG IS EASTSIDE BY HALSLEY AND NIGHT CHANGES BY ONE DIECTION[HAVE YOU BOUGHT A TICKET FOR THE CONCERT YET?] Hope mom is happy and in great health.Keep her happy ,she is really counting on you.Dont let her down.Serve her right after all the sacrifices she has done for the sake of you JUST YOU and no one else. LOADS OF LOVE ,STAY SAFE AND STRONG.THE WAIT IS WORTH IT. LOVINGLY YOURS LAKSHMI

Epilogue

almost 3 years later

hii my very pessimistic self Lakshmi Aradhana

I am doing wonders after 6 years, I did get into an amazing college and the one you always wanted ya NLSIU Bengaluru....

Lief 'lyuol da gvitrenhye ot to isorste ttha edusma gnchdae be noe sinetl ad yelrla lla ym tbaou senidoci. Saw ohsewom ni evry nda i nidfres me evha eiws arduno nad eht eolppe i i ghrti maainzg enbe tgihr lkuyc apcel ietm vaeh. To tgihn a hot aaavkmli ertho oewlh ti adn i ostpdpe ilatgnk swa heca. Keli sillt egos gtrnos ma uoy i yatsgin no eifl iasd. Adsy ervy be nuraod nsitnpehri in nda otw fo i i casue rfom pspkdei am ydas ilergaf uyo gp ot nwirtig opredi a hiennca. Si tkea adn em isth awht od to tsawn ate esrt lheocotac gdo. Ish much, rhskiwse os oh dvole ot wot rfo i nowd a hmi tca ltas adh yuo yaesr. Eh i i em poeh lilst mhi so disfn imss giana h,cmu. Rewe ew ad leki won ianag tehm hrercy tsseri shaet all hdnepepa yiafml dna tasf tbu nludt'wo maisb nuf ywa ehomrt on abkc chum erteh os acft hitw it aer so hetn ew sied gtysina morteh tihs it eht ebt i of love t?hgti so adn hre. Bmsai sekli asuec ehrrtbo hwo emt ew nad rechry gods astht. Smthon eebn ssdaep wto a'htns aog retag ywaa bsiam. Nuobce ho sthi tog peniistnhr nuitsh uistpd og thsree' nfu i'm nda ackb orepaetd agnno e'llh he lcla so upp my riudnej si imh prttye emte so i eh nwe rtefa mih aby,b lrea eh qkicu a si lgliysth. Eods rkow to yuo rehwe ahev ego,s ptsiud i aer the naourd ,flei asr,th ese eaykaatw vile ubt mne you rhte'es fro uesgs i eptncioxe ilef hte nwemo rnvyiteghe nem ilek heav fro ad no lkie ,otu all eofy,srlu htis ear ylno mrof. Ierdfn you nno tnwa rgtae who oianncoms,p tiwh hirte all amf aoky or aegsssl? ewrnsa im hvae is omnwe to ym ugy elam tsapterih uisneqot derinsf tebs os terehi to **** i rouy rae gn be ikle. Amonrl alme fdrsine do rea i *** aevh how nda. Salo yruo tesre'h out kwno ese ohtnm, im reriuettnmc ta gania out, txne so it llit' to tlerte and snutr xeitedc for l'li orkw uesr ohw l'li nda kolo cderas. Ot eth avhe nad ollfyuehp up ont i oolk ta the glrrea gcaer tylatinsn egvi cierupt. Da evha mra by nad ttekci i crnetoc aakeatnlhd 1d a ylrpabbo and on foartvie on maf gsno 2002 crtnoec my si irs ubt woudl mrbr ddi we tno wlli how i teuglu da nr iroenun isht onsg ttho a fun v to i og in buy ofr. 4 won fo oelth ((: apeny d'eod eth and rea etmh off nayclob dide etehr mila tusj shi. Shade aim si atth lkie rlyael nseoars ikel had a ta a atsht os delki rarhy se)grgtul uoy znay thwa yuo giig rboke a earhugdt nma, pcki ?t??hsi 'esh tub w ifra evnre i ad(h rwnhtgio hiwhc off skeep slao nwo fraeth suyeraennsc ruyo ts??eysl. A new and gtonte arrhy malbu rlseeaed e,mti rmeo i ksis clnolyiocaas wthi ad es'h litsl evlo eltssy lal hsi nkgi sdoci clenyter ea,rrec mscui *e*r*- sitoc caphre. Tol habris fun kisgsni a avhe i bene idvheaa. Hent atltase and like aer ad at the tbgigse ym tno i od od emtmon ggrinifu hug atnw upurtsis tno i irreosw my im oefic,fs in boj tou ywh i od rkwo slitl ot ontairmc htgins heest. Me igrcny ogiklno nda dhaivae to ti oaubt waht othwr fo iblvuanelaa kwno ta tno tsi slilt uoy **** od uoy btu rapt ngnridepo arcsve i ont mne mi hgtri. Ubt gest chsu eormht on fie,n fiel ym is hte all vrsnee si mtei. Ybe kya. Llsha dna hvae ufn i ykl.

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