A letter from July 30th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, How you doin!? well,the present me is all messy,unwanted and irritated I`m 16 and a month old now. You know how hard teen years can be , I hope you are okay cause right now Im not .Everyone is all judgy about all my decisions including my school and the course Im in.they made me doubt myself just cause i took commerce.ah!screw them. My friends too arent even trying to help me cope up with my lonliness.They are adding to the misery.My whole life is now a big WTF? Anyway if you are reading this STAY STRONG LOVE. Do not give up easily cause that is what I often do and I regret it a lot. I hope you are surrounded by positive people who might as well give you the importance you give to them;if not its ok .You dont always get what you want and in my case I never get what I want [Im hell of a Pessimist]. As per my plan you should now be in abroad studying Law and also have your own dancing blog [II think of me as becoming an incredible dancer] .I hope you are on the right path. You possibly remember your breakup with your bestfriend like that **** hurts like hell more than my love breakup.well I think about her every now and then.I know Im stupid.who`s your BFF now? lemme take a guess.A boy who wears glass and is the most handsome around.Hope Im right.[these are defo not my preferences ,its a wild guess I promise.] For the brighter side of life,Im still alive battling through a Pandemic. I will give my best to stay the same so that you can read this and idk get a motivation about how life is always a huge disaster and its not your fault . Let me give you some advice.Stay away from stupidity.Friends arent always there for you[sooner you realize the better ].Also not everyone you think is your friend.Dont let people take you for granted.LOVE YOURSELF.Things are gonna get better,believe me the thing you are worrying about right now and crying about it every night isnt even going to stay in your memories the after two years.You might even laugh about how silly you were.Time heals everything,EVERYTHING.Focus on your skin health ,Dont make me look older than I actually am.Lastly when you feel low, have some coffee and watch FRIENDS or Brooklyn 99.I bet youll laugh your heart out forgetting all the ****** things happening then.When nothing goes well in life,take a nap. CURRENTLY MY FAVORITE SONG IS EASTSIDE BY HALSLEY AND NIGHT CHANGES BY ONE DIECTION[HAVE YOU BOUGHT A TICKET FOR THE CONCERT YET?] Hope mom is happy and in great health.Keep her happy ,she is really counting on you.Dont let her down.Serve her right after all the sacrifices she has done for the sake of you JUST YOU and no one else. LOADS OF LOVE ,STAY SAFE AND STRONG.THE WAIT IS WORTH IT. LOVINGLY YOURS LAKSHMI

Epilogue

almost 3 years later

hii my very pessimistic self Lakshmi Aradhana

I am doing wonders after 6 years, I did get into an amazing college and the one you always wanted ya NLSIU Bengaluru....

My ot be nesodiic oen ilents ot thta da ssoteri erllay touba rhveygneit lla ielf egncahd esmuad ly'ulo da. Nda in rhgti itme cluky em nda aws revy rgthi uoanrd eht nbee eolepp i manizga whoosme apecl aehv evah esiw i dnfrise i. Wsa hot sedptpo hace a elowh ti reoht knlgait to iavmlaka nithg and i. Adsi feil tlsli i stangiy orgsnt gseo elik am ouy no. Ysda i dseikpp snpteniihr ni ryev fo ot pedroi be gnriiwt sady fiagler tow roduna and ecainnh romf gp i a am you uecas. Athw to is gdo hsti eatk ster wnats and em chltcaooe aet do. Oh dnwo cat uyo os swrehkis i to stla ,uchm ysera shi dlove dah imh ofr otw a. Him anagi me i phoe smis lslti so i ndisf uh,mc he. Ad i ebt therom dan th?git on kacb nuf sretsi but fsta we wtluond' htme cmhu het hcyrre fo lla dan epedphna her aer eerht ti voel eohtmr we keli hsate actf iths awy os onw were tngaysi so nhte bisam igaan hwti so iymfla esdi ti. Ohw atsht cryher dosg ceusa ielks dan we msbia mte orbtrhe. Goa ohsntm spdase yaaw ibsam owt geart been nat'sh. Ygislhtl icukq nad erdujni so terpyt ufn acll wne byba, bkac go eesrt'h erfat si i my nonag imh eh m'i he ihst mete ogt him h'lle is prnihniets oh ouecnb pup so iuhtsn erotepda piustd eh real a. Tbu rea uoy klie no lvei lf,ie noyl ,oegs eth ptxeocnie mne uesgs tyeheinvrg i udispt rae uyo leik sthi omwne osde men ahts,r orf ot rlo,suyef hrewe eifl ofr ot,u het rkow es'rhte kwyaeaat lla veha morf ese arnodu i vhae da. Uyo to etireh snaewr dinfrse wnemo oyru trhie gs?asesl fma kyao btes be lal srepattih onn mela gyu are npioomns,ca gn im refdin oeniqstu twhi trage ahve i woh ym or ot want si os lkei ****. Who sdefirn ehav dan olranm i are do laem ***. Lrttee ncteteirumr rfo 'lli orkw im e'htsre 'lil lit'l also os dan ntsur ignaa ersadc it nwko see to nda txne at u,to ryuo ohw seur ookl dxceite out hnmt,o. Lyulphfeo adn prceuti the i eahv to ta pu ton lkoo eth geacr arrgle ninylsatt egvi. Yb gsno abbprlyo unenior fam thto ew i on v how liwl idd tcrocne ad a i brmr nfu lwudo nr tbu utegul ybu d1 ad i hits ofr 2200 ym dna tetick hvea a troeviaf ton sir rma si ni ot recnoct og and on edalaktahn sgon. Ffo ddie 'ddoe 4 the hsi hloet (:( just of bocyaln and ilam aer temh own eehrt anepy. Shatt amn, enver kicp gwnohirt mai yse??lst aols had hatt ahdes taehfr iraf gerthuad eikl a ekesp utb breko kiel st??hi? fof rahry ynza ssoerna ggii eh's uyo so oyu royu rencnsueasy (dha ylrale a a ta won is gu)gsrtel ahtw chwih w i keild. Oaalyocliscn oemr haeprc edarsele siodc da rryha hsi *r*e-* cere,ar aublm nleycetr i adn oelv seh' ,mtei tihw new a all eysstl nogtte siks gink scmiu sllti stico. Unf a i eneb nkisigs otl eahvaid avhe rhbasi. Ym od rowrsie da suprisut tou ot i ehtn are ikel i mi mtarinoc od i od otn lteasat lstil my nmotme hgu obj at ni sgbgtie tinsgh htsee tnwa kwro teh foiefc,s why and not ifginrgu. Tsi thaw i llsti do at ibvalulnaae ouy ot **** btu it obatu wnko icgnry scearv tpar twrho em lonogki fo uyo im dna otn rgnneipod otn iadveha men hgitr. Is elif steg ym utb eth enevrs rtmheo lla uhcs f,ine meit no si. Ayk bey. Lsalh fnu nad ylk i evah.

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