A letter from July 4th, 2020

Dear FutureMe, I hope your happy. I hope the majority of your days you're excited about life when you wake up. We're on the finishing touches of nan and grandad's house. Things are finally looking up for us. Mum, dad and Billy are getting new cars and I'm getting a pretty cool shed to live in. I hope you're treating yourself well. I hope your not using food as a coping mechanism. I hope your main goals in life are to help people by making a positive difference in their lives and to fucking enjoy life because you deserve it. I know you have been fighting for so long ever since nan died your depression started. In these recent months a lot has happened. Covid made me stay in my house for weeks and weeks which has been hard. But I've also found new interests like music. I hope you continue to use that as a healthy coping mechanism as well as fashion. My one direction phase has came back they better of got back together otherwise me and Emele are suing. You better still be obsessed with Thomas Headon and Harry Styles, what could you have found that's better than them? I've also really began to acknowledge my privilege as a white person, realising that I don't have to worry whether I'll be discriminated against because of my race. I hope the black lives matter movement made a change. I'm proud of you. I'm proud because you are still alive. I'm proud that you continue to put on a happy face while inside your struggling. I hope one day your happy face isn't fake. When you open this you would be 16 woo you can finally buy Red bull without mum giving you a concerned look. How's that Thomas shape family group chat? if it's dead maybe you should get in touch with them. Also Mollie asked are we still depressed and are we still friends? I'm currently listening to cherry on my fine line vinyl are you still collecting and playing them? By now you should've finished your GCSE's, bet that was hard. As long as you pass everything you're sorted. Have you learnt to love yourself no matter what? Also stop being a pussy and stop being embarrassed, embrace it. Question your anxiety, be the best version of yourself. Is the happy Katie back like what mum desperately wants? Holly said do you hate her yet? My current answer to that is that she's one of the first best friends that I have had that I think will last a lifetime. I'm willing to give her multiple chances if she ever messes up because I value our friendship. She knows that I will let her know that she's being annoying lmao and I would usually slowly back away or end the friendship from arguments but when we had our first argument. For the first time I wanted it to be over the next day because I realised she's like a sister to me and even if I annoy her or she annoys me I don't think there will ever be a time when I would be happy to walk away from her. I hope she's doing okay, I hope she finally finds her worth in life, I hope she realises why everyone around her loves and cares about her. I really hope that life treats you well from now on. I hope you haven't got worse. I hope that even on the worse days you can still find reason to live. Have you spoke to anyone recently? Have you checked up on your friends who always seem like they're doing okay? You know that you need to let all your problems out otherwise you'll burst. Remember the friends that were there. Remember the ones that made you dance like nobody's watching. Viki just asked if you're are healthy and happy? and ofc Tyler replied with "boring". I hope you give your friends chances and don't believe everything they said about someone. Just be nice and empathetic and supportive. I want you to be the type of person that makes them say she was nice after you go. Make effort to be the main character.