Subject

Dear FutureMe, If you are still a virgin by this date, give up on waiting for love and go fuck for christ's sake. Make sure the guy has no obvious ills, make sure he wears a condom, and just fuck. Feel it. You've waited long enough, and you shouldn't feel guilty or dirty for wanting to fuck. You don't really believe in God, but since you've been a good person all your life and It hasn't done shit to allow you to meet Mr. Right, go find someone to fuck. Now. Do it. Craigslist, at a bar, a friend, whatever. Just have your first fuck and enjoy the remainder of your twenties.