A letter from May 17th, 2020

Dear Future Me, elastic heart let me start by this Happy 17th birthday by now i have a car or not i don't know but i will be driving and Allie may be married if that don't happen i will be surprised because they are supposed to get engaged in the next year or so i will be in the wedding like somewhere coming up or it has already happened i am so excited for it because i will be a bridesmaid i am really happy about that so yeah. when you get this i want you to think back at what you have accomplished and what you will accomplish. I also want you to think about would i be happy with the life that i am living 5 years ago because i know i don't want to drink so i can be a organ donor i hope you are playing softball because when i played this year it was an escape from everything like my parents fighting and not loving yourself or feel like no one loves you. This was my escape because i saw my second family my softball team you will never get that kind of bond again in another team so if you aren't friends with anyone of them make mends and i hope you have your first boyfriend by now and just to let you know never be afraid to shoot your shot with what ever it is, if you want to go to college then go, if you want to be in the military then go don't be scared because you will never know the outcome if you don't try, and also know that your MIND gives up before you body so you can do a lot more than you think so don't ever give up on anything even it is the smallest thing know that you can do it push yourself to the limit. Don't you ever stop trying because I know you are stronger than you think you are. and if you don't feel loved know that you are. If the people your are toxic don't be scared to leave them because they are no good for you and that they will just make it worst. by now i hope you have got into at least one or two fights if not what were you doing if you have you better have beat their *** and i hope you didn't swing first because if you did you probable got into a lot of trouble or it was like 6th grade year where my mom gave me permission to get into one because she was bulling me i wish i would of taken that opportunity not going to lie. wonder what school you are going to but i hope you are in phi mu because Allie was in it and i look up to her and sk. If you are deciding to go into the military just know that i support you and if no one else does then you don't need them because it is your life and it's your choice not theirs. you have always battled with that choice the military or college and major in criminology just know what ever you are doing is helping people because you always wanted to help. I really hope you have gotten help with your anxiety because it's bad. I want you to know that what ever we are going to go through in high school that we got through it together, and for the future don't ever let a guy tell you that you are nothing because you are everything and you don't need a man in your life to be stable in life you can do everything by yourself because that's what your capable of don't depend on a man in the future because if you depend on the to much then when they leave you will fall if you do get back up don't stay down there. KNOW that you are capable of EVERYTHING you put your mind on just look at us now we made it through high school and middle school ( which was HELL) love, past me