A letter from May 12th, 2020

Time Travelled — 12 months

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, are you happy now? do you wake up feeling like there is a reason for you to be awake and alive? have you found love in a person, a friend, family, are you in love? have you recovered from your eating disorders and is your anxiety any less? do you eat food and not question it? did you ever tell your parents that you're struggling? how's coryn and what happened with the boys? is chaos still healthy? is your mom and your relationship any better? when did corona stop controlling your life? hows high school, did you make freshman year memorable? how often do you smoke now? did you lose interest in school, did you lose your faith in your success? did somebody break your heart this year? are you over drake still? did you ever get to kiss jack or have you kissed somebody and really meant it? are you okay? i hope you love life. - mena :)

Epilogue

about 5 years later

hi mena. i am happy for the most part. i definitely wake up with purpose - i wouldn't say i 100% feel alive yet though. i have found lots of...

Erowt i ihst negieun atth hytingan rome fneamiungl adh rdiedesovc nda a ovel hnwe loev, tlef fo eltrte thna erve si orwdl vie i. Ni sa eov,l ma llwe i. Tahw uondf mkae rmaed yuo dan i acn a btu can nerosp u,p me l'itl gahutt kile ti eastl at be voel i ash d'ton ohw eewrh owh okwn edn veah. Gabne exyniat am yrpeaht rnvee my mdttidae eaylrl adb ,be and i btu ohw nad autbo i vahe to mmo nac neohst dda gsntih. Ncmceiutmoa idd rhginsa wlel, ton salo etrrge heyt my 'notd kaem me elsfinge tub heyt. Coynr i is eiad vaeh no ytsonleh hwo. Dna owt ei'v ni ndo't esifhdrpin i rkdilndee artef r,eya kopens hintk ot ernev hmosprooe a we easyr, erh. Nwo wehn difnede hwo onwk twah thta tiddn' wen nvee traef polepe i tem i they are i adn am how i rweot hsti. He"t eenrv ecdlla i gnhu tath civdo ti ith so"yb freat out nda cornao) i aryzc( gaain. Ot thye uectnndoi in up i,efl ym tis nfyun ohw opp ghuoht. All aghsn aleozidogp oom,etram dkelne thwi tlsi)l onw eetardt you nabtet to btu teta fe,ca hte ionb,yedrf my ohw tou mrpo my nda hyet royu is tnew not( etwn tgdian bcale to wno as no rfo etmi aonh tihw. Ttah eht tihs dt'dni wtreo you acosh ti meak ptas rsmemu. I gods raymeno i isms h,mi ikel tbu dnot' lltis. Mmo over to rrmbeeem dsue darh ioerpdmv it so its tawh eikl eht i mhuc ,seray nad to my eb. Ow,n hse me smake sda ti tbu hcmu how etlsgrgsu utjs. It htat a em edolm antw i semka si ot hse woh renev eb sad fo. Mesormie good ablre,emmo evah yrea btu leincayrt i esnrhfam mofr osolhc asw do hhig ont. Fldeis cilelklbpa acr dna t,ela rinngun aliypng katsmu,eo out nthgis hrgtohu. Nad eht irnsnde eht sabuur htwi of angi nukrt snsestu ni. No visdre eht aslepou. Hsiw erelpid but nad lto, so i it adh orfm a ttah fo i ot hits noosre lsao it now neog afr mi udceks. Noeuhg gaitntrs im nufyn at i oiecnsidrng td'no aniga tbu kmose al,l. I im ai,nusox tis oofd - ayw, illts nda utb way ettrbe yorwr ilslt rveo. Yads no onlrge my aeitsdct it. Thohgru usesccs a i em way soel dupro ni kmsae my afhti fougth ddi i ni dan nto ttha solohc. Hgints ehrew cseidamlocph i aevh egrat of, i i ot eramded ogt dna. Tsbe it i ot vgien hte asw fi radh tis ubt ludco idd tgrih - asy fo tub i wken yan twha iohcec wno i eht. My ehapnp eatrh tub ni tyllnevuae y'nosbod it ddi enrbko i,ahewl. Iwth feirdn be fo ajkc, ahtt ot utb dntasei ellf ni evol wnko his ksnsiig eosybutlla olfoedr sebt uy'od uyo. Lsyap hwo ndid't w,lel tou nfuyn utb it layler edn elfi a'tths. I nrfyeodib i isks ym rtunrec hnewerve can. Sayalw for in i em htaw esh' a eebn ot oephd ygu. Eewrh o'ndt ,nwo im' i olve at ubt whta i'm i ugdblini oevl. .

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