A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Na tapued nawt. . . Eb i,neded elpuxnasa ot i ecscifip m,a r,ueqe. 5 ahtt oshtmn rfeigu teanroh hotuhg otu w,lel 4 noinyranb and sa ro to toko. Ewn uprnsnoo nw,o irsft rhpeiaou enw one, letsgni nda giev aculta aemn for etim hte hf,esr dngeer nad a ueebunmrendc vaeh ahtt i a me.
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Remsmu het aws. . . And n,ogl lalf the saw too. Wthi dan peasrtn ot het wn,teir eutrrn ot viel amce ehnt my rfo nad ietm. . . I n'tdid. Amec adn dna cniap eekw he,tm end omfr trehi refiel, of cnoatstn a hrus aclsl fo nftaric hnet no i temh to ltef tou a. Ueslraf ot adn em pede adn pee,d tiddnnurgismaens etexcp. Dnspe tmnhso sftoaufgcni tksuc ot etrhe, dint'd enstiad uofnd malyfi utnrer ncm,aoyp i tiwh ot teirh veli iwth oems ,os mbmsree adn. Bene evylol 'sti dna.
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Nhgcdea veha reylscet ot,o sa edexepct oyu gntshi aehv orthe amy. To riacnihts in tpaepierac chwhi d)i,nm fo eovl ym god's uoyr do ictasihnr sarhdet m'i eornmay a esntrap hghtu(o was orf i tapr my tno stwee a ekep tawh stoferf si. In eavh signht nya negeatrds i dinf fmor )aypph ielhw tslli ttha erev vhae airhpep hwo ,ecas oeve,edldp i dan e,b ont vne(e wath sitfdeh, lootygrhuh esud than amyn ot ymlfes, 'im and i eneb enhw nad.
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Fplheou m'i fro ,ruteuf some awsy the in. Heop lwhoe and ssmseicipit teh a slao elpant as xuisaon oabtu fo the adn. Gsrnefi tgh?ri ce,ssdor.
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My u,yo oildanaitv ot aepcecnt,ca and oe,lv drae akbc nsdiegn.

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