A letter from March 24th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear Future Me, i hope you're in your dream college today and everything is not in quarantine. Also hope you're able to read randomly thousands of books, watching endlessly tv-series and hear your parents how much they can't wait you to come back home to İzmir for holidays. I just checked the part i wrote now and i realize how formal it is smh.(göz deviren emoji burası) Whatever, everything is not so perfect right now, i am hoping to study more hard the rest of my last 3 months to THE exam in quarantine, make better results on denemeler and going to win an excellent university ve allah rızası için şaşırtmak my teachers be. Valla geri kalan zamanım için 12. sınıfım çöp olmuşa benziyor, mezuniyetimi bile görmeden ve balo elbisemi giymek için zayıflamadan koronadan ölebilirim ya da en kötüsü zayıflayınca bunların hiçbirini yapamayabiliriz. ALLAM LÜTFEN 2020'de EXCELLENT ÜNİVERSİTE YARABBİ. Nys. -öhöm- For now that's all i can say and i really really hope you're feeling soo beautiful and actually are, comfortable with yourself cause you showed your real potential abilities actually to yourself and so happy (cause i need to be right now), that you forget your 19th birthday because YOU ARE SO **** HAPPY TO REMEMBER. I hope i laugh at the situation i am in right now in your day, show this e-letter to my new friends or recent ones to make them laugh and be even more happy. Also, maybe you're in contact with Beyza, Rabia, İclal, Yaren and Gökçen. Maybe you're not. Maybe you met Asude again. Maybe you lost one of them. It doesn't matter, try contact and thank the rest please. Even if they don't know it well, they made your life better in so many ways you know. If you don't, know it. Because your life wasn't so easy (maybe because of your thoughts or the situations you're in) and won't be easy at 18 if you're alone. Make 19 better for yourself. Eat sushi, secretly hate it. Drink as much as you can. PLS CHANGE UR STYLE. Learn a new language. Improve yourself. Try everything you want. Don't dissapoint your 8-year-old-self like i did. Please love yourself. Don't push to crush even if things go wrong. Kendine de iyi bak, soğuktur oralar. PUT SOME CLOTHES ON LİKE YOU SAY. Burası pek soğuk olmaz, alışmışsındır. But make a snow angel for me and the 6 years you couldn't. Smell this message, i am sooo sure it'll be smell like cologne from my quarantine days. HAPPY BİRTHDAY. SANA LOTS OF DEZENFEKTAN YOLLUYORUM, METRO TUTAMAÇLARINI TUTTUKTAN SONRA KULLANIRSIN. Değerimi bil. byü.

Epilogue

almost 4 years later

Dear past me,

Somehow, in 2021, I didn't reply to this letter. I think it was waiting for me to answer it today.
The horrendous days of quarantine ended in...

Acn 212,0 earxl ouy.
Ndo't auesecb atculyla we sratted i ntȧislub ivle nrtpsea raye omdve the ni ot y,raemon ̇irmiz rou ,clleeog. .
Yuo eht to in ihg,tn dızıyl tnkeki soo,o hers'e otg. Aeinigm enhppa the oyu in ti nto aws tbu gitnsh dwoul vene to. . . . Ngaselgua nidtsguy trhee oe'ury in. Refhnc deelran wokn uoy adn a?thw ouy.
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Eirtw to necfar teh lsime a on but ni gnigo ofrm to oyu ads this orom ecaf htiw r'oeuy og oyur oyru oprm lnuct'od drom.
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Ihtw ktnih nto as yna you as eoyru' the ocatctn in fo aoevb rntfquee msane. Mhte eevn of uoy neo slot. Girth sdeegus atht :).
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Ot otg bsc in oyu yeran oyu weer het mr,deari ldt'uonc go gwnided craefn.
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A she ,ifen uin cpale cilȧl si ot ocles ahs. Ouy susge day ubt meas ulo'wtd wto noit eth nifdre oyu seom of the etohsr uoy 'oudcntl inu echa thta tog eht of be bste wtih tereh htme.
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Good si göçnke. Shuoe esh ni dentre a ağmlu. Uuttk hse tesidus erthe wtih. Btu mhi sryr,o yuo eemt d'ditn tey. Ayd oslce tub moes.
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Iiżmr baair deiusts ni. In ealev tbu agnai lutodcn' afret ot erh gto 'yeoru rżiim uoy see oyu otcnatc.
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Illw ees day calutayl oyu eno sadeu. Nbeig teb indm hsti ilwl fact i rouy bowl a. Yuo i ees eeths dindt' wnko gimnoc.
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It i you mthgi rwee kwno aotbu be agtkinl stȧibuln nda sadi enhw odcl yuo. Any mena, veeebil nd'idtt sdia pleac i you ldae nad eher utb thta lccilfpayies su. Ot eht arncef na ozer hnrtneor hiwt erthaew uendr fegneirz. Nceri in acnerf sbeuaec 'sit ???w?tf lodc ot be os nad hcum ni.
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Aenpph regstugsl. Eth tsla ehyt in yrase 5 ppedneah. Yman ,rhda rndeboaksw feilrtd epelpo aynm btu htwi too wekodr ynma oyu dha. Oyu dna ehiert fo tosl you ercid nwte rptseia tlso to tbu. Gto wthi tnhareo lsoa but eon t,mmeeisso eovdm sebt ot oyu ndsefri out of dema os dbe of oyru ads eplepo yuo tncodl'u cryuotn oyu. Wnok her yte even 'odtn uoy ?naiga onwk hawt nad ouy. Re,dmas enve ont this ni ni si rhgit? uory.
As enev a aubot uoy tsitruo nkhit oyu tnhraoe ouytnrc ti wnok to torwh secbuea oigng don't i dto'n. .
Is, hgnit yuo rwoht hte it. Uylol' i,knht than reufosyl yrwro reom voel no'td oyu neev. .
-ldal-frsoeey8- nidd'tt uyo yuro kile bedlivee itspiosdna uoy. .
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Ssih,u yuo yuo ryve it y,pilculb dahte gusse dtrie i. Hte naer andsmc'odl htta tearf aesbcue phos you ot hussi ntwe hte. .
Smoe you, erla acn as swno no put fater i akme ealng cthik sa a fro sono loshtce l'il i. Sillt iyvuarllont erhe i rhee acebeus le,ooncg >(: teh ellsm it em nca i olsa ohtbgru ells eyth t'dno tiwh ti secin.
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Doog asw nda 91 stl,yla. 8 ta yuo dema srniedf new 19. Ekil lsee oto one yeth did no you ehledp. 22 wn,o ocsel si or'yue 23. Ytr fdsre,ni uoye'r uoe'ry ifel tslli tlils orfsyelu seclsleu kignma pvioerm wen ot bouat and. Ngiht 'eyouv y'lluo ryev tbu erev eht ostm uhmc flt,e ha'tts see isellpabu.

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