A letter from March 24th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Dear Future Me, i hope you're in your dream college today and everything is not in quarantine. Also hope you're able to read randomly thousands of books, watching endlessly tv-series and hear your parents how much they can't wait you to come back home to İzmir for holidays. I just checked the part i wrote now and i realize how formal it is smh.(göz deviren emoji burası) Whatever, everything is not so perfect right now, i am hoping to study more hard the rest of my last 3 months to THE exam in quarantine, make better results on denemeler and going to win an excellent university ve allah rızası için şaşırtmak my teachers be. Valla geri kalan zamanım için 12. sınıfım çöp olmuşa benziyor, mezuniyetimi bile görmeden ve balo elbisemi giymek için zayıflamadan koronadan ölebilirim ya da en kötüsü zayıflayınca bunların hiçbirini yapamayabiliriz. ALLAM LÜTFEN 2020'de EXCELLENT ÜNİVERSİTE YARABBİ. Nys. -öhöm- For now that's all i can say and i really really hope you're feeling soo beautiful and actually are, comfortable with yourself cause you showed your real potential abilities actually to yourself and so happy (cause i need to be right now), that you forget your 19th birthday because YOU ARE SO **** HAPPY TO REMEMBER. I hope i laugh at the situation i am in right now in your day, show this e-letter to my new friends or recent ones to make them laugh and be even more happy. Also, maybe you're in contact with Beyza, Rabia, İclal, Yaren and Gökçen. Maybe you're not. Maybe you met Asude again. Maybe you lost one of them. It doesn't matter, try contact and thank the rest please. Even if they don't know it well, they made your life better in so many ways you know. If you don't, know it. Because your life wasn't so easy (maybe because of your thoughts or the situations you're in) and won't be easy at 18 if you're alone. Make 19 better for yourself. Eat sushi, secretly hate it. Drink as much as you can. PLS CHANGE UR STYLE. Learn a new language. Improve yourself. Try everything you want. Don't dissapoint your 8-year-old-self like i did. Please love yourself. Don't push to crush even if things go wrong. Kendine de iyi bak, soğuktur oralar. PUT SOME CLOTHES ON LİKE YOU SAY. Burası pek soğuk olmaz, alışmışsındır. But make a snow angel for me and the 6 years you couldn't. Smell this message, i am sooo sure it'll be smell like cologne from my quarantine days. HAPPY BİRTHDAY. SANA LOTS OF DEZENFEKTAN YOLLUYORUM, METRO TUTAMAÇLARINI TUTTUKTAN SONRA KULLANIRSIN. Değerimi bil. byü.

Epilogue

almost 4 years later

Dear past me,

Somehow, in 2021, I didn't reply to this letter. I think it was waiting for me to answer it today.
The horrendous days of quarantine ended in...

Oyu can 02,21 xlare.
Noeyram, edttrsa glc,eloe uor mvdeo ̇mrizi laulcayt eary 'tndo cbeusea levi ni ew het ot erpstan i baṡtuinl. .
Uyo in ehe'sr ot sooo, zıylıd eth got gtn,ih ntikek. Eanphp aemgiin eth wuold in nto ignhst ot eenv ubt uoy saw it. . . . Rtehe ngstuidy ou'yer gauslange in. A?hwt and nrelade yuo wonk nfehcr uyo.
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Uryo tiwer to eth on in rneacf oury to rodm prmo oruye' go romo odlun'ct tub mfro sda noggi limes eacf tsih wtih a you.
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In otn u'eory beoav sa of hnkti ayn qtereunf msena eht sa otcacnt whit you. Nvee slto emth of neo you. :) tgrhi htta seegsdu.
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Uoc'tdnl tgo og frnaec you the ot aerdrim, in ryaen oyu sbc dedwgni weer.
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A inf,e oecls to licl̇a she uni sha lapec is. Btu eb ehac difrne inu l'tduow of emht tog herots thta inot yuo uoy dtlcnuo' oesm yad twhi fo aesm teh ebts ereth teh ouy ssueg teh owt.
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Si godo çöenkg. A ni ğlmua teedrn seh uoehs. Ehs rhtee thwi tutuk edtisus. Uyo ,roysr tbu imh mtee tdndi' tye. Ubt yda locse eosm.
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Ribaa ̇ziimr deuists ni. Iagan utb oyu eavle etrfa in uyo atncotc her ot gto ese 'tdcluon oeu'ry ̇rmizi.
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Will yuo atyucall dya sduae one ees. I nigeb owlb siht ndmi uroy ebt fcta a lilw. Tsehe ddt'ni i kown you gconim see.
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Gliatnk i it ltuaḃnsi nhwe dlco rwee be onwk yuo oautb htmgi uoy sdia adn. It'dntd ttha idsa yuo cfipeilascyl yan eehr i nad eilbeve su ea,mn btu celap aedl. Rcfaen an wethaer teh nudre nrnhtreo nzregefi whit eorz ot. In anerfc os be creni in humc ot adn w???f?t dclo aebceus sti'.
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Gsltegusr enphpa. Ltas hte sayre 5 in ehednppa hyet. With owsnkderab hda oot dhar, ynam wokrde mayn delirtf mnay btu olpepe you. Dna rdcie lsto ehteir petsiar you twen sotl utb to oyu fo. Bets but uoy mmsoeit,es oyu aosl irsdenf oetharn fo yuo dmae ot deb ogt evomd ontucl'd so fo uyor opleep tihw ncortuy sad tuo one. Neev athw dan erh wkno uoy tey on'td nokw uyo aan?gi. Tsih ryuo si ni ni evne me,asrd ton hit?gr.
Owthr eevn as it wonk iktnh t'nod oggin sueaebc a uyo ritsout uocnyrt ot otnd' i uotab raoenht yuo. .
Rwoht tihng ,si oyu it eht. Htan ryflusoe enev h,nikt 'yloul tdo'n uyo orywr elov rmoe. .
O-r-el-lsdfye8a yuo ouy 'ddittn ilke ruoy ilebveed insstdaipo. .
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Dehat ti sugse yrev i lcl,bypiu uoy oyu rdite ,siush. Uoy entw to eaesbuc siuhs fatre hsop teh nl'aomdsdc anre het taht. .
I emak owns ctikh ill' utp noos can atfre as erla ouy, ofr oems i elagn a as hcloets no. Nca llrnoiuvayt me it ndo't elslm no,cegol eher tilsl the gtorubh thye iesnc i i slel aosl htiw erhe >(: ti buacees.
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T,sllay saw 91 and gdoo. 8 fdiesnr ewn uoy daem ta 91. Oto slee ddi eyth uoy noe keil no dpelhe. R'oeuy scoel 23 is ,onw 22. Sltli ilfe fsuleoyr esleucls to nad yo'reu tyr boatu wne erdfnis, eipormv slitl oyreu' naimkg. Ubt chmu hignt sotm vere yolul' ese tts'ah e'yuov teh rvey ft,el uabisellp.

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