A letter from January 14th, 2020

Time Travelled — almost 2 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So today is the big day, the big 30! I guess when I was younger I had a set image of what 30 was supposed to look like. I would look to Jams and think, one day that’ll be me. Married in a home, with 2.5 kids! Of course the lord had other plans. Life never plays out the way WE want. It’s down to God to determine these things. These past few months have been a crazy whirl to begin with. Today I’ve received 3 important emails. 1 from Nia listing the last pay they’re giving me (which happens to be peanuts). It left me infuriated, in total I gave them 4 years of my life. 2 volunteering and 2 being employed. And during those 2 years I experienced and survived so much. But the end lesson is that I survived, Alhumdulilah I made it through. Soon after I received another 2 emails. 1 from WGN (my new work place), listing the docs I needed to bring in for my DBS. And 1 from Zohra at the MYH for me to come in and meet the team. Alhumdulilah I’m truly grateful for when one door closes... and I never expected all this. Lol I’m still single AF at 28. I’m sure he has a plan for that too. These past few days I have felt a little lonely but sabr is important. I know he will have someone special for me waiting. I hope the 30yr old Seeni isn’t still single. I pray someone is stood there with you, by your side. I hope and pray your heart and soul have been healed. And that you’re warm, full of gratitude and have a renewed energy for the decades yet to come. On the 10th Jan 2019 Sanna reminded me that it was exactly a year since our trip to Kenya and our incredible safari trip! Thinking of Kenya gives me goosebumps. Alhumdulilah there are always incredible times to be had. Just work and pray towards them. These past few months have taught me there is good in life. There is always ease following the struggle. A newly turned 28 year old Seeni is sending all her love and Duas. I hope life has been good. And if it’s been tough, I pray you’ve had the strength and support around you. Just like you did this past year. But always remember to be kind to yourself, you have become an incredible woman. Love x

Epilogue

18 days later

lol life is a funny thing isn't it?
So it turns out I grew leaps and bounds professionally. Found a work place I absolutely loved, with the...

Eeirbicdln mots sulos. Dan my eepxecirne was dhar a rewhe owrk rgosieecdn orkw lcpae. I mhcu os was odotepmr so. Eewr dan fco rtnub tenh lal uto lttiel tbu we hte a hit niecdmpa. Eeval eoyrjun iodnseic wne adn ductiflfi ot tkea nfid idecded a to i the. Htsat hceared si i e'htvan teh htta ifel ieoiattsnnd twah utaob tub oa,ky lilst. Eartf trohe alslm het one bbay ingkta hte sespt,.
Ewnittr efll in in oosn adn met oriyn 2020 had vloe is anm lerett i a eth tihs dpelye i ftear i. Ays ym ouy dulco rifst. Aws edpe and rmaw nda ti sneinte. Dmin he indd't gcandhe dna mfnroi eh dsuohl em isaelre sih. Tnew yaer our snvyaeirarn we eth os nreniag 1 ewloh eyra,. Maed nda sanlp rdindskga amirrga,e dditelae kids a ofr. Lpfuain aws it. Ctu icdynbrlie depe ufnpail adn. Utb needde stugoh made i lhpe rhutohg the adn i it. Gtbrhi dha no ot top t0h3 minrgon hill i ti uablueitf ti h4t1 my tath nda lal i i isremorp fo adem gwnkion eht ta fo vevsuird janurya otosd 20,22. Ntosicss is nsorejuy tsgif eth ndbelieirc slalm iag,tkn adn o,f tbu ielf pessrisur we hatst epek thaw hntnoig dan msot we loptemc,e receeiv. .
Wen tmso may a teh olst ieidnlbrec met ovel ubt ttpoaien''l ahev i gib i idrnef. One vleels dffneteir our cegnpiexnire lseiv, ni hbto eeddne rheanto hotb ew of loss. Bnee hte esbt is't x fgit.

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