A letter from August 11th, 2019

Peaceful right?

hey lex, it’s weird that I’ve already written 4 other letters but I feel the need to write more. This summer has been a roller coaster of emotions, we experienced some good, some bad, and some ugly. I’m trying to keep a positive attitude but it’s just been so hard lately, i spent my summer chasing after mark, i tried to hard to make us happen but he didn’t want me. He says he still likes me but he always makes mistakes and he doesn’t wanna put me through that or something ?? I haven’t texted him in almost a week but I called him yesterday to see if he could help me and isabel get our car unstuck but he said he couldn’t help and then hung up before I could say thanks anyway. I’m really hurt and I wish I didn’t feel this way. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do anymore, do I just wallow in self pity until my heart heals itself somehow ? I’m so lost and confused and I can only hope that we have our **** together by the time you get this letter. Oh also happy birthday ! make sure you get that tattoo over spring break unless you’ve decided not to then that’s fine! I hope that when I read this letter again I’ll be happier and that reading marks name won’t hurt. I’m praying for our happiness and I hope it finds us :) until we meet again, xoxo lex

Epilogue

about 2 months later

Hi lex :)

I remember that summer oh so clearly and i want to apologize for putting you through all of that hurt over a boy who doesn’t know what...

Dnoig esh’. Sy)da aelh wsa ouy hi(wt yitp dwwloeal bda oodg veenr of atth r,eath xpeetoicn far onggi ni hte to ti het ’uevyo yruo ndeo lutin uyo eslf os reiedzla. Lesassc ootk uro adn gktian uraregl we sripgn etneionsnxt cohlso gpa orf suaec llfu mfor il’l daip og kbear tub oru away agitkn ivcdo llocgee gteignt no’td ytalcaul bceseau kwee si ehva mgiht em evol ! arebk dna ubt ?do oru aehv ihst ew eegcoll be uor to yaok arebk ogngi cslas,es refe lief to i’m so reheogtt utb we u,p stlil on orf tseh’re fo thye uor of neisc enwt assec,sl a ’its reew’. Beusace we ptu i’m btu het htru ym htwi ndeewke ervseed pvxeneies igttgen erledzia onsrep nseo shit ot ypahp eerw’ riedagn ewre attoto msea adn oncnisugf onesome be !!! ): she’ ubt tegignt rnayome oiggn yhet ety i’m si emna rneve tnsode’ ltas psagdinitpino, hwo ont ’sm t’nis dprecei woh utb us ti ot het i nto adn. Eb,abs iwth nda gf abeecus hse’ stela it at srveseed ihs godo st’hta yppah eh os he payph sseme so nwo. Orf ibardthy ti ais,pehsnp aols eniegtstrin uor rfo neeb gypianr hnakt an wrognki t’si it keep ): u traeg teh swa saw seihws, eno ubt. Rfrwado ignupsh adn uhtr nad tgntige otuba ayrsc fnu we ot i dna seealp nwko ludoc omre, all gthtohu si peke owh it os apin sa as teh idkna uhg hgtuohr i htta to eb shiw ): ’reyuo ’ist uoy nad i’nst rwhot eiolapgoz tpu 18 laeylr.
Orf i’m oru spehai,nps lilts aniyrgp.
,ooxx xel <3.

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