feeling...

Peaceful right?

feeling... sharp. dangerous. full of attitude. which, I guess, is just what a girl about to go to college ought to feel like. When you, future Anna, get this, it'll be ten years from now, and the passport that you got today will have expired. How was going to school in another country? Was it far enough away from your parents? What prompted past-you to write this (besides the fact that the trusty sketchbook/journal has gone missing) is the fact that, among all of the suitcases you were looking for in the attic today, you also found a hefty dose of family history. History from 1840. A picture of the family goat. Hand drawn sketches of the cottage. Letters back and forth between two feuding families. One family claims its daughter was starved to death whilst visiting the other. The other family is outraged because of a false arrest upon an unfounded accusation of THEIR daughter being a member of a house of prostitution. All insults and accusations in flowery, minute, faint 1840's penmanship, of course. I don't even know what the point of this email is. I just think it's weird that on the eve of your departure to distance yourself from your family, just when you're feeling incredibly independent, the attic delivers. Now, past-you wants to stay connected, be Bess's great great great great granddaughter, add her own tale to the many family stories. Past-you wants to stay in the attic forever, reading the family history. But I guess that's why college is good. So you can get the hell out of that attic and this house and make your own history. Go on.

Epilogue

3 days later

Ten years ago, I was a senior in high school aching to go to college as far away from home as possible. I wanted to see other countries and make...

Soseirt ym own. Iedt to lfet mnleoantum neev to ealve atth ko hmoe utb oplefuh i it, dna asw as — left i rinhteyevg enadnpl. No leik saw oefreb pu thnoiemsg me oenpnig wnisg furute ym. .
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Eislv th?aw nca eht dwon tbu acn yawa eruutf dna rcyza ouy cleso who our kwon ,agnai otsmeiesm t’si be iwdep. Omhnst netwtri i goa 2020 fetra wksno tleetr tretyp dreanel evlid resay eth htsi htat htat, ubato e,wll neslos ubt efbeor who hsa thrhuog tne isx saw llew nyneoa. Hwit hrroetb i and asdoinedg — ym acrnec was.
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Grhti aths’t omslta to ,yas ognuhe rehte. C,xpeerieen trfae tiycpla rasey deinfsih ewf igkatn end ni i dna eb a otg him i tihw ehlp ot off het mhoce guohht the iwht rveen oleglce hnte lvlteynuae enve. Ni tdlo erotahn eglolce akme hatt tyialcp ahppy ym i’d if ot i esrem,mio tvddaaeste oelgcle be iewlh eevnr ucon,ytr ro otg be or og ot lg,elceo neve i ae-no-gaeryt tadnntgei flse. Now of the fo tub meos hbroret ihgnotn ot htat sauroomhp i het osls loss nwko is hegelloop-ec epmorcad ym.
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Flee and ta pesron abck rfetfnedi lod lefs her i 18 lycoepmelt a oolk like rmof iemsmesot i reay ym. I rhmseewoe ehr of then etim lerplaal veui,nrse ni tdoesui xiisetng a mgeinai tub. Hist taht ertlet rwignti itwnagn oatbu in tstar egt itstign ot dna ehrte rhe ehs’s dan wyaa ro,lwd elfi. Foorl erh no and dna nda ’eehtry muisc nteh into and hte rfo ridensf adn otethegr brh’stroe ksalw ’sshe dna buota ktianlg magkni egnndriwa gngio adn snigitt nad rom,o rta, okioecs jtsu uighagln onw ondw. Tuboa ti go be adn hvae hntorrne more fo ldoh fo noe eth ispdgnne yt’erhe wtha aoubt iwll illw llwi to yda o,wn ees etmh etyh reasmd ysea,r tlngkia in smeratt etn mioresme rgaieinzl who to iekl eth higtr oolk ttha kitglan igsthl, ot htta hoegrtte iceldan wtna nto leif day eno oenn lnoy gone to hte eimt no ot dna ahnt herot noe. He was ym ernifd setb.

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