A letter from Jul 25, 2023

Dear FutureMe, Hi. It's me. I wrote this when I was 13. How are you? Are you now okay? Did you figure out the things you couldn't figure out? Did the things you found hard become easy for you now? Are you doing fine? I hope. I really hope The past year has been hard—super hard. There are nights when I can't figure out what happened to me. I changed a lot. Nights where I am so disappointed in myself. Sometimes I can't handle what's going on in my life. I'm only 13, but I can't handle things. Do you feel pretty even without makeup? I hope. Is Alex still our crush? I hope not. I have a lot of questions and stuff, but all I want to say is that I'm glad we survived. Because I thought we couldn't, I thought I couldn't. I hope one of these days you can forgive Papa for the things he has done and for the things he hasn't done. Is Nanay okay? I hope she's okay. I hope everyone around you is fine. Do you still hurt yourself? I hope not. If yes, I want you to stop. I want you to stop hurting yourself because things are so hard. You can tell someone if you are struggling, but I know you can't because you are too scared. Is cris still with you? If yes, please tell her how much I appreciate her, how I love her for being there with me, and how she makes my life happy again. How about pretty girl? You know, she helps you get close to Alex, and she would send screenshots of his day. I hope she's okay. I hope the universe treats them both well, because they deserve all that. Did you become a SSG representative like you always wanted? I hope so. Do you still love books and music? Do you still cry whenever you think of our dad? Do you still cry whenever someone's yelling at you? Is being a flight attendant still our dream? I hope. I have so many questions, right? but I guess that's the end of it. Please, after reading this, pray to God to keep Alex and everyone important to you safe. Pray for the homeless. Pray for everyone's well-being. And I hope you will pray for yourself as well. I love you, and I hope you are okay. Please, start loving yourself like you love others. I want you to know that you did great. You did well. your 13 years old self.