A letter from Aug 29th, 2021

Dear FutureMe, Today’s date is August 29, 2021. I’m currently 21 years old , still living with my parents, still going to college, and still worried about my future in the mist of COVID-19. Tomorrow’s my first day back doing in person learning at Bowie State University. I’m nervous because, I know that once the semester starts it’s just gonna keep going no breaks whatsoever until I graduate. I’m excited to graduate but I’m so scared of what my future will potentially be, like will I still be struggling financially well I have a job that I love so many questions so many possibilities that It’s completely overwhelming and stressful to even begin to think about. Jase 💜 just turned five a few days ago which is like insane to even think about because this man was just born, so it’s like amazing that he’s become this little human with thoughts and feelings and ideas. Blake ❤️ is 12 which is even crazier to think about because he’s literally almost a teenager , and he is going to experience so many things such a little amount of time and I’m like scared and excited for him but it’s like wow I was just 12 now he is 12 that’s insane. I family is moving soon from 5717 and I don’t really know how to feel because I’m excited but also I know I’m gonna miss living here I mean it’s been 12 years and that’s a long time. Space from The rec center will definitely be a good thing for me , even though I’m still working there as a kid care aid and a teen night coordinator , I feel like simply not living directly across the street from my workplace is really good for my mental health. OK down to the nitty-gritty, I hope in five years I finally fell in love or at least had a relationship with someone who loves me for me and appreciates who I am and above all is thoughtful and caring. Sometimes I’m so scared that no one will ever love me romantically and I’ll be alone for the rest of my life because there’s been a A lot of unrequited love in my life, it almost seems as though I’m cursed. I know I’m not ugly, my personality is like kind of amazing, well you know I won’t go that far but you know what I mean lol, it’s just that 21 years in and no boyfriend is unheard of for people my age and the people around me. It’s so many factors that goes into why I haven’t had a boyfriend yet and if I get this letter in five years and I still have yet to have a boyfriend or any type a relationship with a man I am going to scream . It’s so crazy because not even to be corny , But I know if I were to be in a relationship with someone they will be so loved that’ll be sick of it LMAO. But maybe that’s just super naïve, matter-of-fact I’m sure it is it’s just funny to think about. I hope that I find myself and my insecurities don’t overcome me in every social situation. I hope that I am happy, loved, alive and appreciative of every single day and I don’t forget that I’m on this earth for a reason, for a purpose. I hope I learn how to communicate with others and become a better listener because honestly right now I suck. I really wanna learn that I don’t have to be perfect , and I don’t have to be right all the time while learning to accept my faults. I’m pretty sure I’m not gonna be able to completely master that within the next five years but still try to develop the skill of taking things in instead of always putting out. Right now being 27 or 26, actually I don’t know how old I’ll be in five years to be honest lol, i’m so tired I literally can’t even think. Anyway, being alive five years from now seems absolutely insane and even in tangible but I know it’s coming because time moves so quickly. I’m pretty sure I’m gonna forget that I even wrote this letter to myself once I get it . I wanna be like wow I can’t believe I was just 21. See you in five, Love, Dominique.