A letter from March 7th, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear Elliot (if that's still our name), Are you ok? I hope you are. Things are pretty ****** right now, and I just started crying. I hope we're doing better, that we are out of the closet and into the transgender light. (That sounds like such ******** at the moment.) I just got a new plant, and my stomach hurts, and every time I look into the mirror I sometimes want to laugh but mostly want to cry. Enough about me. How's 7th grade been going? Was the summer good? And are we accepted? Happy birthday, by the way. You're 13 now, a real teenager. How does that feel? I'm proud of you for making it this far. I ordered a Cavetown t-shirt today, How long did it take to come? I'm really dysphoric right now, so hopefully you've started making steps towards transition. And one more thing: Do we still see Avery, and do we still have a huge-*** crush on her? I will refuse to make an *** joke here. Anyways, I love you (maybe more than I love present me), and I hope we're better. So much love, Elliott, they/them

Epilogue

7 days later

hey, love. first i wanna apologize. ur life is really, really difficult right now. virtual learning sucks. but good news! we are so, so much better now. i love my...

Evne nad ndrsfie ihra tsloceh sotmyl lsoo,ch dna ym adn my. Ilek i rspone ,dan teerbt nf,feose no nhta nhtik tbu own mhcu oyu m’i rea to itghr a. Bteert a hvae i uchm ciahurt oasl. Reew e,ohysntl ouy awht inkinthg?.
Lmpteadocic onw rgedne cuhm os ruo si si rhgit ti tknhi athn oyu orme. Eqrue nede im nyoerma tbu omre anht nda salleb yan taht tdo'n mi i srnat. Sfnidre ttha otn nda ,tib uro utb a fo is’t nkow igb a umm adle. Gntish yunnf emans are. Yb i go vevneeegi oltsym adn sthta ow,n aihgtrl ihgrt. Eth nsroopnu nw,o any ues ayw yb ew. Mi leorpypr frmo ubt ntlpa nwe euhos egrndai now, one race up jtsu hatt dade ti no a wne ohw i is of dan go ertha take ot. Sint' fi( haretm,po wath a i nowk ondt’ htta s)i. Btu 7th si a bti fidl,iuftc gread nuf arylle. I lhityng btu nyrcgi vahe nac opec het hoitu(tw hate on i seyfml own o,miemtses igogn uoy. Saw a dineru thdbirya my ) tbi yllveo tub oetirehws by cv,dio. Ewer’ cxdeite mi’ cmr!ah bdyneo nieges ni iimkts. Own cetsotn in s,aol tirwngi 100 i oladlsr a. Rmeo mi’ now, s’ti erndwlfuo ntwigir nad. .
It ot’dn fkgucni mc,ae mebmerer ewhn htta tsihr did i btu. Orf eesbodss we roew ti niaga a never ti thwi tmohn weer neht. Si sure now ti not eerhw ’mi.
Mcpa ryea saw het nfu saw nda ,oyvlle tenx agnai os ewer’ ngoig mrumes. Eerzali yb ahev dna chsur a ho, no y,wa rratbet oyull’ ouy oosn teh. Nuf have taht htwi. .
Ym aervy with odg, ho. Ouy no ahtt hse asw hnta ,teem yepttr life whstonry-oow ni eh’ss ceaf elogog sles gte laer swa btu teh i oyln. Oetntg uldo, seh too nda we’ve oot tkasl and awy her lvleoar revo mcuh. .
Bree,tt ’rwee uhmc os voel. Ahtt rebermem.
Eo,vl.
Vgeeeveni usnonrpo (nya. ).

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