A letter from May 7th, 2020

Peaceful right?

Hi *****, I've been dealing with this for a while, and I just need to talk with somebody about it. I think that I may be Lesbian or Bi. I've felt this way for a long time, but I've just ignored it or told myself I'm 'confused'. My parents are homophobic, they were raised conservatively, and I don't want to talk to them about it. They don't know yet. The church at ****** is really open-minded, and I just need some help working through this. I don't want my parents to know (at least not yet), so sticking with e-mail would be good. Thank you for being there, ***** That's the letter we just sent to our pastor. If not now, when? Sure, it's Coronavirus. Sure, I'm quarantined in with my homophobic parents. Sure, I have absolutely nowhere to go and no resources to speak of. Sure, I'm currently sitting in a closet (really) crying. Sure, I'm mentally probably not ready for this. But, if not now, when? Wherever you are, good luck. And I love you. And so. does. God. -You a year ago

Epilogue

2 days later

Hi dearie,

Well, it's a been a year, that's for sure. A long, 15 months of March with life transformations packed in to the brim.

I suppose you'll...

Wtna puetda an. . . I am, ,ureeq ,eenidd be psanuealx ot icecipsf. 5 tshomn to htat freigu onhreta otko sa el,wl dna otu 4 ro arnniybno hhotgu. Eht ueprahio that adn nuoprosn ltcuaa enw vaeh r,fhse em nederg one, a enam a evig eimt legnsit now, ofr wen dna i tfsri eebmduerucnn.
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Asw umersm eht. . . O,gln too asw the afll nad. Meac nteh return the to rof ihwt my i,enwtr vlei dan adn miet to entarps. . . Dd'itn i. To rfom no a a ihrte ttnncsao tou letf of den fo ethn nad m,teh ewke i rush llcsa and npica feeri,l acem cniratf tmeh. D,pee nda riseutsgmdinnadn em ot texepc resaulf eped adn. Rntrue iehrt hwit omse ot ao,cnymp itwh s,o nufod nmshot ht,ere i ot 'intdd mlifya epsdn csktu iagcnffusto bermmse dnsaeit viel and. Tis' lloyve and nbee.
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To,o evah otehr ceytserl sa daehcgn sntghi may uoy ehva eedxptec. What is for fsfeort aptr yuro saw ncshirait oanryem a not nischatir mdin), pciteearap edashtr fo ihchw ot my dgs'o a neatpsr ni seewt im' ogh(hut ekpe leov my od i. Fidn that hogyhrolut ,eb i'm twha dnasterge env(e listl csea, i ysfe,lm ot ph)pay erve fitdeh,s nad ewhn udse hsintg in mofr i evha amny ton nad ihlew yan eebn hant vahe peirhpa oldpeve,de who i and.
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In f,uurte for foluhpe wsay smoe het 'mi. The fo hpoe tuabo losa as dna a epltan howle messspciiti eht onxsaiu dan. Tirg?h nfigrse cos,esdr.
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,you nigensd enecctcpaa, and my ,evol drea ackb ondtaaivli to.

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