A letter from April 30th, 2020

Dear Future Me Currently, I’m sitting in my closet while our sister is outside in our room. The Night We Met is playing. It probably won’t be by the end of this since I tend to have a lot to say, but it’s just detail to paint the picture. I’m 14 and a half. Freshman year is over. I thought it would be interesting to write a bunch of **** so you could receive it. Three years from now, or to the moment you are in, we’ll be done with high school. High school always felt so far away. When we were in elementary, it’s seemed like the concept was unreal. It still doesn’t seem real. Remember how we felt when we barely entered middle school? Our first thought was “two years before high school”. We always thought ahead. I genuinely hope we enjoyed high school. We have always understood that time is limited but had a hard time playing it out. Actually enjoying ourselves. To protect our feelings, I thought of saying that I hope we’re practically dying of excitement and anxiety to leave home and high school. But honestly? I hope we aren’t. I hope we cry when we realize we won’t ever return to high school. That you recall every time anyone made you laugh. Or times that we made memories that we can’t help but smile at. Because then we’ll realize we enjoyed it. We actually enjoyed something. I hope you find the person writing this somewhat different, and almost immature because it’ll mean we grew. Part of me wants to ask you about boys, but we’ve always been above that. I hope you realize that too. There’s better things out there for us than these boys who can’t think about anything besides ***. Wonder if you lost your virginity? If you did, I sincerely hope you used protection *****. No kids ******* up our plans. There’s people I want to ask you about too, however I don’t think I care. I hope you made the right choices. If you didn’t, I hope we learned from them. I just hope you love yourself man. I hope you love the world and that you feel like there’s so much ahead of you. I hope you understand that this bittersweet feeling is so beautiful because you’ll be able to finally complete your dreams. It’ll be scary to wave goodbye to your teenage years, and everything completely about your childhood. I think you’ll be okay though. I’m so excited for you. You’re going to do so much man. I hope your confidence has raised so much. I have full trust that you will do things right. I want to question us on everything about this present time, but I think I find comfort knowing none of this will matter in a few years. It’s beautiful isn’t it? Life. Hey, I’m usually not cheesy, and you know this. I can’t seem to help it right now. It’s a wild thought to think I’m graduating and leaving everything I know once this is read again. I wish you love. I wish you growth. I wish you know you’re worth it. I promise I’ll try for us right now. I hope we get over our fears. I hope so much, and that’s good I believe. We’ve been so hopeful all our lives. This is it. This is where our hope will start playing out. There’s so much ahead of you, so much to do. Never feel like time is limited. You have all of your life to do as you you please. You’ve never been the type to get easily pressured so don’t be now. Wherever you go, your dreams will follow. I’m so excited for you man. I swear, life will be good once you start loving yourself and do what you want. Live. I guess I should stop typing now. I love you. Kick life’s butt for us okay? From, past you. P.S: We’ve never been the type to let things go. But let the negative **** go for me yeah? Good luck, farewell. **** that ****.