A letter from May 16th, 2019

Peaceful right?

Dear Future Ka-Rin, It is 9:23 pm on a Wednesday and I've decided that for my 18th birthday I'd surprise myself with a letter. From my 17-year-old self. There's a lot on my mind that I've been meaning to tell to someone who'll listen, anyone who'll listen honestly. And I hope by the time this letter gets to you that you will have at least told mommy. Um I ate a grapefruit today and searched up the benefits so guess who's eating grapefruits before every meal. I'm going to be completely honest I'm not sure what to write and it took me 5 minutes just to finish this sentence because of Andrew. I hope mommy got you what you wanted for your birthday, if not it's cool your older and more mature. LIfe is changing pretty fast and it can feel lonely (cliche right. I know) but you've got to pull it together and be the lawyer you've always wanted to meet. Please future me, be the rich eccentric aunt you've always wanted. (lol). Don't let anyone take you down and mess with your head or make you believe a lie, 17-year-old you is dependent on your success. Mama's gotta bring home the bacon and mama knows how to get it. Now I know what your thinking, "this letter kind of makes no sense." Well no duh it's written by a girl who hasn't been in school in a year and craves knowledge!! I'm starving here! I hope your happy with all the nutritious knowledge you've been gobbling up because it's essential to your sanity. I'm going crazy in this house. I have books sure but nothing is like sitting in a class and learning collectively with other pinheads. And by pinheads I mean idiots. Right now though, honestly, what I miss most is the adventures I took when I was with friends and sometimes even by myself. Future Ka-Rin, I truly hope you're happy, like really happy. Not putting on a smile for people but real happiness that you can feel. Sincerely, 17-year-old Ka-Rin p.s. I could've written more but I have a huge headache. Good night.

Epilogue

over 1 year later

Okay here me out,
You're 20, and there is a pandemic. Yes, a pandemic. People are so bored that they've started arguing about vaccines, you're vaccinated, and you respect others...

Dna tno ondt' tkae to owyrr ,it ninoipso rgthsi. R'youe ,baseb idocv saebcue otg tgtnoe 'veyuo sthi neevr ouy mrast. Tresesem mndi yoru eekp teh to btu dfcea 'ist ugeshtto oy'evu eneb no lefi dlor vyo'ue het ryou of adhr dan gintry bene. 'nvthae to hsit t'hsat dne alesssc sutj lylmeant lewl uoy metreses ,hrad oggin eebn eevn t'wnree dan het. .
You a 3 nwet from. 6 3 gap to a. Ihst u'voey tub got 0. Otn ewre far you lnypte uttsr amsrt frmo 'its em 'uryeo nad reehw tisll too. Eadsrg joeny eth is own tgo tersss to adn otn uoy ywa o'uvye ssslcea od used lla jsut your to revo. .
Sa sa og sifndre far. . . A eloglec you frist eayr well tdnd'i nutr to she hetn idenfr eb het fo etarg otu dame oyur tub stbe. Ygnnhita wsa it fo do oto obth ndi'td esh yuo idnk ab,d of. Ton ellcoeg iybradth my llwe 71 uo,y niot is em nweh i i ciesn tgo leta swa ubt. . . No a rteid ahisa weetebn a to nda on uyo of hse dkni dna satht' ubt ocefr dgewe naaywys,. Stirsse rae ofr ilef. Drnugo you shti ldeh you nkow adn your. A hothgu uyo oto hhars ltelti were. Wllofo garmnaist eht uyo nhgoue lnahierptiso ot maed and so hetm irheet oyu ouy and on stju gcholhhosi ttxe oruy eervn fsenrid teh lony frdiedt won eortff. Setsmere ot euyro' tshi try elrlya gniog tbu. To e,m utb ttha ceitndo nalelghce ersdtat eneb sdinfre vi'e icsaklgn 'vie otn teveinygrh to aer tthwiuo tath isfnedr. .
And evor crpee astht' spndroeies in sseeermt tdeir ktae stla ot nda yhw bpabylro. I etl nt'wo sorty eb my thta. Serisnodpe otn mliignca iereth im'. On nmea olhd ti em sha in on sjeus. 'im atkl esmsteer ntduasnedr ekma ,won thsi ot offret dfni i adn tmhe to an ohw em eplope eorm ot ehost adurtennds dan ggnio. Lacltyau eb estho ceatcipng ear owh btu leppoe hwo dan odt'n ndsn,tdauer ot tepnerd usjt. Oshet hwo smlal emak edbsate lsitl hgstin vaeh iwth nac cpotllaii me ndto' but. Too for eht chmu mi' aingks tbu in si neam it mabey it juses os nda adn m'i ciialgnm. .
Rreemebm and ekli no het ssuje llwi lipems rlgeon i tikhn illw em no ni oasl gof tnigsh 'tis or of nmae i ldoh efel imdn lmiac i htta esloo acnt'. Mane i hte wlli alw lilw aoscrleh'b sejsu in etg my rthee ascsl ajy pot at regeed go i ym rutgedaa dna ot fo john rof and. Sleboips tigshn all neo fo ohtes ngihst nda rea si tsih. .
Ojb a oh eoebfr on tbryahid kdin tog dna oruhs on ryuo yrou doog no yad job uyo fo and a eeft asw rof swa yuor ftsir it sngdatin 20ht but a. Ti doclu dan wiht you rnyhgevtie pu aled krwrcooe borrihel yuo slee neded btu eildp eht. Yeonm rwryo yuo eamd 'dnot good. Ahtt ouy ogthmnies no!!w! uoy a eevrn yu'lol uodwl in reya adn hohtugt euohs vahe just nitkh ot a reecxneepi taht ayczr i'st uyo oh. Ehs' srlalddno nos btu gto oryrw, i,enf eslasadtu teh uro yb dda otn'd. Uyo etliad og n'otd kwno to mi' niot wtan usre rmeo btu awnt to i. Nsoo neghuo ul'ylo etg eethr. .
God etesh tshi its' pnphae grereta roeveney that elt eh ddeiedc else anc and reoth egt ttah dwuol ctnfifeeg sgtgbei rsuiv eht ot owh tub we nhigt si so ghisnt hgitns retbet zryac. Eh tusj ikel atht rokws. .
Swa,ynya i l'il fi eth lgtiank tlas adn on htta vaeh lilps rysea otu heter i eitm rfo ekep. .
Absbe ootelds. .

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