A letter from June 21st, 2018

Time Travelled — almost 3 years

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, So, right now, I'm sitting in Josh and I's shared bedroom in his mom's house. I just finished my first reflection journal for the first 50 hours of my practicum at SVC. I concluded this reflection by saying that I don't want to work in campus life. So, I guess that's something. I'm broke as fuck, in so much debt I could cry, and I'm not in the best physical shape. But I also have a family I love, a wonderful man by my side, and friends that mean the world to me. So, life's not bad. Sometimes I think back to when I was like 13 or 14-- did I envision my life as it is now? I'm so fucking proud of myself for the things I've overcome-- I have a college degree, I'm halfway through grad school, and i finally have a reliable mode of transport. I think little teenage me would be pretty amazed at where I am now. So, who knows where I'll be in 3 years? Will I be close to an assistant director of residence life position? Will i even pursue residence life as my first job? There's still so much uncertainty in my life, but I'm not scared of it. So, in three years from now, I'll basically be old. Just kidding. But I'll be closer to thirty. Which is when I said I'd want kids. How will I feel in three years? Will I have a better idea of whether or not I actually want to have children? I think I chose thirty because by that time I should know what the hell I want in life, right? I'll be more stable financially I hope, and I'll be ready to decide if I want to have a child. Who knows. I'm only 22 right now, not yet 23. On another note, I realllllly don't care about any more of my birthdays. Maybe 25 because car insurance or whatever. I guess I'm a little scared of aging-- It means losing touch with youth, getting more wrinkles, and physical deterioration. But even when I get this letter I'll still be in my twenties so maybe I should stop being so morbid. Okay, I'm seriously getting annoyed by myself, so I'll wrap this letter up. I guess this will be a neat little surprise in my inbox three years from now. Maybe I can do this again after I receive this one. PS thanks Pantsuit Politics for telling me about this. Hopefully your podcast is still going strong in 3 years. Or, ideally, Beth and Sarah will be running the country in some capacity. FUCK Donald Trump. okaythanksbyeeeee

Epilogue

about 1 year later

It's kind of a weird feeling to read this as a 26-almost-27-year old. I've been through so many changes in almost five years that I view my 22-year old self...

Easry nïave sa i !wno uoy ugses a tath ot so + vfei wlli ogllba iaepndcm do. .
.
Ym on esiorl:p choosl grnelo hewsateetr hghi jsoh i whti ma. For i astl to of fo ihchw lnyifla e-dm-a ahve enhrotiaplsi both dtegarau ndede l,ohocs eth yaer pu ym cdiseion eginb i could rou best us cediedd ni ned. Erlnbcyidi we we adn npuhpay aech orf ret'wne jsut erwe roeth hgtri rhgteote. Yares utb i s'he to ewll teerh kopnse gonid him i 'nehavt in hoep won. .
.
Ganmrea nad wsa mte ;redfin yesar tbse saw wno i:i he meoseno ferobe i rlwatam my an ta eipolsr part talyulca a mriared ot itennr i i'm hnew. Ingth tsrif we nda hte from sdasgeem recnteneocd cclsias saw _"__ app i imh a igndta armawlt"? on. Vows my ni ewddgni enedd a harsep thta soal pu. .
.
Arye ojb fo uabot i !(!!) utaaderg tou am my hlosoc ot of firts isfnhi 3. Fcat is ngitry noisotip yap tslil to that hatt areis rnyletec the snfanitigci i a ccdteape osprsec 'im hoentra. .
.
Ont ttah end li;fe eiapgnhnp ta houhgtt i i cdeseiern up dnssogoe dne ddi ldouw pu aahh ahtt tfca eth hknta in. .
.
Etim no llhe ho sdki gihnav ayn 'erehst hye,a i'm onso yaw in. Aveh a htis i fi 'sit eoc?oy!nm in dna noe doen do ldch,i. .
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Abtou igthr n'odt me i stpa ornyema ,saol athsdbriy ym oen tbuoa asw inht:g acre. I baotu i odl item how fhla het heva ma ot knthi. .
.
Prta tpar em arembce of iyntrg tisll me it utb ash gn,aig isht anthoer yorwr fo ubtoa si ot. Execneeirp day mosce fiel i ma iswdmo dna guleafrt eag wchhi whti fro yvree. Raec as a lsse i taoub i htat gsraintt atwh estorh itkhn enotci mnwoa i ma me gouyren of htwi hchwi eleymmnsi to udrsggtle. Ermo uyo era if at ienbg n"sierg s"leoon dan aetitpn i flei suck to etsvne tnhageci teh eb to og pitaetn let a ;bti tlltei ubt em lliw illst ecnrte. .
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Hits of htta acn oeph i erda ohestr estsmvleeh see ni spart dna siht. Somtla osytml in retelt vlytsa srfti etsmi rwee chngsae i hsa my sy;ear iencs as vimeprdo oy2raedl--2 tciudilff utb xepieecnder ifle seneimm ghrwto rwoet ym dna efiv ive' mseo a. Tou trscoiidpen oen masotl uto hoghttu ti ti's my dan dna owh onen lapy alnp eoths ywa !(wwe)h urte fo feli amce awtned i nfuny louwd ot. .

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