Dear FutureMe, I hope you've scored a goal in soccer. Otherwise I'm going to be at your bedside at while you sleep, and I'll just watch you. In the occasion you should wake up, I'll be there to scare you.
Are you still going out with Lindsay, I hope so, she's a great girl :)
You'd better have some subscribers or something, otherwise I'll repeat what I mentioned earlier in this email.
Oh yes, and I hope you Christmas was merry :)
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Why is this inappropriate?