A letter from May 12th, 2020

Time Travelled — 12 months

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, are you happy now? do you wake up feeling like there is a reason for you to be awake and alive? have you found love in a person, a friend, family, are you in love? have you recovered from your eating disorders and is your anxiety any less? do you eat food and not question it? did you ever tell your parents that you're struggling? how's coryn and what happened with the boys? is chaos still healthy? is your mom and your relationship any better? when did corona stop controlling your life? hows high school, did you make freshman year memorable? how often do you smoke now? did you lose interest in school, did you lose your faith in your success? did somebody break your heart this year? are you over drake still? did you ever get to kiss jack or have you kissed somebody and really meant it? are you okay? i hope you love life. - mena :)

Epilogue

about 5 years later

hi mena. i am happy for the most part. i definitely wake up with purpose - i wouldn't say i 100% feel alive yet though. i have found lots of...

Eiv si a rvee gytnanhi nifngeulam eeignun hewn rcsdeideov vole oevl, i nhat fo tlfe dwolr lttere troew stih dah orme i thta dan. I lv,eo llwe in as ma. Eewhr uyo llti' uattgh ,pu ekil utb astel nde ekam sha be i voel woh em owh dan nca vhea d'ont ta i edrma ti a ufdno spnreo knwo cna whta. Gsnthi am ylarel tineaxy erevn hwo nda ,be ubt ehva and to pyhreta ebagn dtaitdem i dab my ethnso nca omm buota add i. But errtge eyth idd meka ym inefsgle 'otdn lsao tyhe hgisran tioumnacecm ton ,wlel em. Aevh nstoehly no ohw si i ieda ynrco. Fsdpihiner wot ni 'odtn a espokn we ot reh vei' esra,y rneve rooespomh dna ikhtn i deinlkdre yr,ea after. Ohw atth rotwe tin'dd i dan eeoppl i whne stih ohw vnee ifdeedn wath now nokw nwe emt yeth eftra i i ma are. Uhgn "eht i i ti frtea adn ybs"o aigan tih vocid tou ttah co)nroa rayz(c lcaeld eenrv. How yeth my in ot guohht nfynu oecuidntn lfe,i pop sti pu. My is tiwh ce,af eekldn tou uryo you won nto( acelb meit iwht sa on atte ot ettrdae nad abtnet gdanti mtem,raoo ,dyefrnboi lal the naoh ubt tnwe my to ipgedazloo hyte orf ahnsg mopr onw woh ls)til wnte. 'dntid hosac atps esmurm atth it tewro ouy hte ekam stih. Eikl tslli i yernamo m,hi btu t'ndo issm i dgso. Ererbmme uhcm usde nda ti kiel the omm eb mpioerdv i ars,ey so its hatw ot rove to hdar my. Ujst em das gtursgels kmsea w,no hes utb owh cumh it. Eb a fo it ot dsa venre dleom ohw emaks em i awnt htta hes si. O,meamerbl eimrosme ubt shnferma fmor dogo hgih aery do was ehav nto aeycitrln i oslcoh. Tou tohurhg nda lidsef ltea, sgtnhi bcplealkli kue,tmaso urngnin cra ylgianp. Nda insernd rusuab agni fo het usssnte in teh tkrnu hwti. Rdesvi uspolea on teh. Far shwi now ahd htat os fo a ot deplire tbu im htis uescdk i lt,o oasl ti adn geon it nrseoo fmro i. Egonuh tbu funyn im on'dt i naagi ,lla ta rcdegnonsii snriattg ekoms. Ttbere - dofo wya ist and tub im rroyw vroe xia,nuso i way, tlisl stlil. It egolnr on sady my eiasctdt. Ogthhru in seol i fugtho not mskae way em thifa ddi lsoohc uopdr ni i my atth a dan cesucss. Rwehe f,o avhe i eoclacshmidp eeddmra got grtea dna tinhgs ot i i. Igenv to - i i won nkwe thaw but ddi tbu yna i if of swa the estb cechio rdah it sya dcluo ist rtihg het. My btu nokber bo'nydso ti vtaeylneul did rthea in ahl,iew aeppnh. Yuo that steb eb kown but 'odyu velo fo hsi ksnsgii ni tlauyelbos lfle rleodfo eainsdt firned a,jkc ot ithw. A'stht utb yllera lsayp woh it wel,l dne 'dndit tou feil nynuf. Issk ym cna ordnfieby i eheerwvn i reuctnr. I been swlaya wath a orf epdoh yug me in es'h ot. I but i'm vleo td'on ta ,now htwa veol hrewe i 'im uilinbdg. .

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